'I've always been deeply in awe of musicians. They seem to hold some mysterious secret that the rest of us mere mortals can only marvel at. Music of all kinds matters hugely to me. Despite this passion, the only things I can really play with any proficiency are my iPod, CDs and my residual and much treasured vinyl collection. Over the years I have attempted to play all manner of musical instruments – including the most recent bizarre trilogy of bluegrass banjo, ukulele, and dulcimer – but none of them will release their treasures to me. I am well aware that the musically proficient among you would barely consider any of those three a proper instrument anyway. The closest I’ve ever got to any proficiency was when I brought a sitar back from India when I travelled there overland as a student. By proficiency I simply mean that I was as absolutely useless as almost every other amateur sitar dabbler at the tail end of the sixties...'